Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: letting go, wala lang :) letting go of the cake
it’s been crucial for me these past few months.. i’m in a point where i don’t know what to do and i feel like i’m stuck. i cry myself to sleep every night and what’s hard about it is that i can’t even confide my feelings to anyone because i’m afraid they won’t understand me..
so there i was. feeling all suffocated that i decided to take a breath for a while. i did some soul searching. i kept on asking myself.. “is this what i really wanted?” , “what if it’s not the path that i took?”, “ it’s supposed to be a year long process but i eventually gave in to what the world tells me. i never found myself so i guess i never will. 
i’m weak. no. i’m afraid. i’m afraid of taking chances anymore. i’m afraid of risking a lot of things because it might not be worth it.
i used to be very brave. i used to be so adventurous. i used to break all rules. but now i can’t. i know i can’t.
there are a lot of things that happened in the past and it caused me a lot of pain. perhaps, that’s the reason why i’m playing safe now.
it’s been a while so i know i had to make a choice. now i’ve chosen what i know that is proper..
choosing is very hard. for i know there are a lot of choices and i can’t decide knowing that i only have to choose one. it’s like choosing between brownies and chocolate cake… both are tempting to eat but i know that if i choose both, i’ll get a toothache..
i chose the brownie. not because the chocolate cake is not delicious, it’s just that i have eaten so much of it. though it’s also my favorite, i just have to prefer brownies instead.. there may be reasons.. and reasons will speak for themselves..
sometimes, things doesn’t have to have a reason. you just have to make a choice.. it’s because you don’t have to be selfish.. and there are things that aren’t meant for you and you have to let go of them.. but if one day, they come back to you, then maybe.. life is telling you that you made the wrong choice.. and that you have to pick the other.
but for now.. i just made a choice.
because i’m not selfish..
i’m never gonna be selfish..
katreena :’)
